I am waiting for some water to boil so I can dye some yarn, and I thought I would take the time to post.
So, recently, there was an article in Salon.com about Mormon Mommy Blogs. First off, I didn't really realize that was a genre. Secondly, well, I think the author's view of Mormon Mommy Blogs is a bit, well, less than complimentary.
I think she was trying to be complimentary, but honestly, I did not like the way "we" came off. I have to include myself in the Mormon Mommy Bloggers group, because I am Mormon, and I do blog about my family. Among other things. And, I read some of the blogs she referenced. A couple of them anyway. Truthfully, the big reasons I read the two MMB's that I do is because I know the women who write them. Those being, CJane Enjoy It and The NieNie Dialogues.
Anyhow, it sort of struck me that she concluded that we are all "cute".
(Water is boiling, dye is added and yarn is in the pot, in case you wanted to know)
I am not cute. My life is not cute.
I suppose some of the things she says apply to me. My husband does look like a cute graphic designer, except he isn't one. I mean, he is cute and does have the cool glasses and wear plaid shirts, but he is a contractor. My house is cute, and I do reupholster my ottoman with thrift store fabric. Well, not quite true. I don't have any ottomans. But I do reupholster my couches and chairs. Sometimes twice a year. With cheap fabric, but that is because I am not loaded. My wardrobe wishes it were Anthropologie-esqe. And some of it is. But sadly, most of the time, I am wearing jeans and a t-shirt. Sometimes a sweater if I am cold.
My house is rarely clean, in fact, the only time it gets really clean is when my mom comes over and does it. She is handy that way, I am not. In fact, as I sit here typing, I am watching 3 little girls make paper dolls on the front room floor, making rather a mess. Around them are a spinning wheel that I didn't put away, some laundry that I ought to be folding but don't want to and all of the pillows off the couch. Because for some reason, pillows never manage to stay on the couch. At least I vaccuumed this morning.
If you look through the door facing me, you will encounter my studio. Which is about standard for an artistic temperament. Meaning, there are stacks and piles of things hither and yon. It's a mess, no question.
I don't have a picture perfect child. Far from it. But I love her more for being not picture perfect. Sometimes she is a perfect little wretch. Goes with the territory of being three, I think.
The author of the article also states that Utah is the state with the most anti-depressant use. That is often attributed to the cultural pressure we all seem to face to be super mommies. Clean house, perfect children, dinner on the table, etc. None of which describe me. I am more inclined to attribute it to the fact that we are all so damn inbred that we all suffer from the same mental illnesses. I kid you not, I think 75% of Utah is related to me. I do have Mormon Pioneer Ancestry, you know. It stands to reason that we would all have similar problems, exacerbated by inbreeding, right? Okay, I jest, but only a little bit.
The truth of the matter is, we may be happier than some other people. Like it or not, we believe the Gospel is the path to that happiness and if you follow it, heart and soul, you will obtain some of that happiness. Now, the problem is, we don't always follow it heart and soul. Goodness knows, sometimes I let my life get in the way of my happiness. This doesn't mean that things are going to be easy all the time. I am here to attest that they aren't. See my previous post about things sucking.
Maybe I don't read enough Mormon Mommy Blogs to have an opinion. Maybe the large majority of them are cutesy and perfect. If that is the case, I think we are doing ourselves and the rest of the world a disservice. We aren't perfect, our lives aren't perfect, but I think, for the most part, they are good. I know mine is. Despite the current suckage.
Perhaps I am different. Well, I know I am different than a lot of my contemporaries in various categories. Based on the number (1) and age (3) of my child(ren), I should be about 24. I'm definitely not. Based on my age (36) I ought to have many more children of a much higher age. Probably should live in a bigger, better house and drive a bigger, better car. I don't. I live in a lovely, very old house with a bizarre layout and unidentifiable drafts. I drive an older car (which I like very much) and my yard is utilitarian, for the most part. I am a feminist WAHM with a college degree and a lot of work experience. I got married late by Mormon cultural standards and had a kid WAY late.
I would say I can fruit and veg and make bread weekly, but that would be a lie. My husband does that stuff. I sew, I knit, I spin, I watch British programmes on Hulu and Netflix and I am a rabid reader. I think my daughter is ridiculously intelligent, and I know I am. I am, like most good Utah Mormons;), surrounded by my immediate family who may not be the friendliest folk, but are ready and willing if needed. And will talk your ear off if given the chance. Well, probably not yours, they don't like very many people. But mine, anyway.
What was the point of this post? I don't really know. Basically, that the article seems to think that we are all kind of one-dimensional people. And we aren't. But, if that is how we are presenting ourselves, perhaps we ought to change that.
But what do I know?