Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Kevin

This is Kevin.

Not the girl.  The girl is Small Daughter.  Kevin is the pumpkin.  He's in a seatbelt, because, well, she didn't want him to get injured in case of an accident.  Must keep Kevin safe.  
Why is he called Kevin, you ask?  No idea.  That's his name.
We found Kevin at the grocery.  It seemed he needed to come home with us.  At least according to Small Daughter, and she knows.  You see, according to Small Daughter, Kevin was attacked by an evil wizard (I am not making this up) and he removed Kevin's face.  Gone.  Wiped out.  And, it turns out, Small Daughter is the Faerie Queen and is the only person who can restore Kevin's face.  So, we brought Kevin home so that Small Daughter/Faerie Queen could restore Kevin's face.  Not only was Kevin's face wiped out, but before it happened, he ate WAY too many pumpkin seeds and he wasn't able to digest them, so she was going to have to do surgery to remove the pumpkin seeds before she could even start on the face.  As we were leaving the grocery, I told Small Daughter to hustle.  She climbed out of the car cart, then dragged Kevin out after her.  She turned to me and said, "Sorry, mamma, he's a bit of a slow poke as he hasn't any legs."  
"Oh, well, will the Faerie Queen be restoring those as well?"
"No.  They got chopped off.  I can only fix magic problems."

I took pictures of the restoration and surger process, it's quite fascinating.

The first thing she did was draw a new face on Kevin.  It wasn't quite up to snuff, so she drew a new one.  Unfortunately, I didn't get a picture of that, because it was awesome.
Here she is beginning the removal of the excess seeds from Kevin's insides.

This bit is kind of hilarious, because she really hates pumpkin guts.  They gross her out.  This is actually the first time she has been willing to remove any of the guts herself.  Usually I have to do it, which ends up with me flinging pumpkin guts at her just to amuse myself.

She removed the guts, then separated the seeds from said guts, because although Kevin was unable to digest them, she didn't think she would have that problem herself.  After she removed them, I took them in the house to wash and roast them for her.  Then she moved on to the most important step.  Restoring Kevin's face.
She started out the restoration with a proper pumpkin carving saw-thingy, but broke that rather quickly, at which point she came into the kitchen, showed me the two pieces that were the result of her zealous work and said, "Well, I guess I'll have to use the dangerous one, then."  And took the knife outside with her.
Here on the left, you can see her checking the eyeholes.
And, finally, on the right, the restored Kevin.  He was extremely grateful.  In case you wondered.

After the process was finished, she decided to paint a portrait of Kevin with his parents.
In case you are wondering what the spots are underneath them, they are the various stages of mold that a pumpkin goes through before we push it off the wall into the garden.  
From the top down they are:
Slightly moldy
Kind of moldy
Really moldy

And lastly, the fruits of her labors.  If you notice that she looks kind of sad, well she is.  Look closely at the arm holding the white bowl and you may see the bandaid at her elbow bend.  In her desire for pumpkin seeds, she disregarded the Queen Mother and got herself nicely burned on the seed pan.  First burn, which really, isn't too bad for a girl who's been cooking since she was three.



And there you have it.  The Faerie Queen's restoration of Kevin.


1 comment:

Kiem Weaver said...

I enjoyed reading your blog… Small Daughter has an awesome imagination and well Kevin's story truly put a smile on my face…. You guys are great… Im trying to liven my blog up as well any suggestions???
Anyway, please keep your blogs coming because I am interested in seeing what happens next!!!