Sunday, May 11, 2014

Today is Mother's Day.  I am alone today, Small Daughter is at her daddy's house for the day.  I know, I know, it's Mother's Day, she should be home with her mother, BUT, she hasn't been able to spend time with her daddy for a week, you think I'm going to tell her she has to stay home with me on the one day she can be with him? Nope.  Welcome to being a mother.
Look at this face.  Could you resist it?  Not if it were yours, you couldn't.  She's less than a day old in this picture and I was already completely in love with her.  I was worried that I might have a hard time bonding with her, since my pregnancy (and delivery) were so difficult, but no, it was instant. 

This is my girl in her blessing dress.  It took me 3 years of Sundays to do all the embroidery on it, which you can't really see in the pic.  Yes, I started on it long before I was pregnant.  I knew what I wanted if I ever had a girl and I knew it was going to take a very long time to do it.  Look at her face, it kills me.  She is so done with your shit.  

She loved (loves) to  have her back scratched.  She's a mini me.  Look how tiny she is!!  She's around 2 in this picture and she fits quite nicely on my thighs.  

I love this pic. There aren't a whole lot of pics with me and my girl, since I was the one generally wielding the camera, so I am very grateful for the few that there are, because she is my heart and soul.

Look at that sweet face.  People used to comment on how sweet she looked, how pixie-ish.  Yes, she was a pixie and still is.  But, she's like those naughty fairies in Labyrinth.  They look sweet and lovely, but they will bite you as soon as look at you.  She has her own personality and opinions and this face is how she gets away with things!

I love this pic so much.  She's a kitty.  I don't remember why.  I suppose 4 year olds don't need a reason to be a kitty, do they? A kitty with attitude.

And this, this is my most recent picture of her.  I took it a week ago, today.  She's seven years old and the light of my life.

She looks like me, and bless her heart, she is very much like me in personality and temperament as well.  I love her.  I love every part of her.  I love her freckles and her gap toothed smile and her bony, skinny body.  I love that she is not yet too big for cuddles and for sitting in my lap. I love her intelligence and strong will and sass, though it sometimes frustrates me.  I love what she is becoming and am very cognizant of the responsibility given me to help her become everything she can.  I hope I am doing it right.  I know I will do things that will hurt her and damage her, because that is the nature of being a parent, but I hope I can keep those things to a minimum.  I want to guide her to her full potential, without being a helicoptor mom.  I want to teach her to make her own decisions and to understand how to do that.  To use her brain and her heart together.  I want her to be happy on her own terms.

This child is my reason.  For everything.  I love being her mamma.
Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there, to all those with a mother's heart.

No comments: