Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Sadness

It is interesting to note the trials people are asked to go through, and to wonder what mine look like to someone on the outside.

Stephanie Nielson was severely burned in a plane crash. She was a physically beautiful young woman. She will never look the same again. Her face was burned and they had to rebuild her nose and ears from cartilage from other parts of her body. She is now undergoing skin grafts in an attempt to recover her body. You can't tell me that physical beauty isn't important. People will stare at her wherever she goes because of the way she will look. This bothers me more than anything else. Her children will not recognize her when they finally get to see her. This is a tragedy. Are there parts of this accident that should bother me more than this? I don't know. I think that we (I) identify ourselves so much by the way we look that, were it to happen to me, I don't know how I would react to not seeing myself in the mirror. How would I react to my daughter expressing fear at the way I look? Would I be able to find myself in this new face? I want so much for her to be okay, and to look normal. I hope she will.

My friend Christian Adams died last week from heart failure, completely unexpectedly. He was 34. He leaves behind a wife and 2 little girls and a third on the way. He was a wonderful man. Unfailingly kind, sweet and happy. He had his trials, this I know, but he overcame the major ones. His lovely wife, she has had her trials as well. Big ones. And she overcame them. And now this...I can't imagine how she must feel right now. He was away from home when he died, wanting nothing more than to finish his business trip and get back home to his girls. I am comforted in my sorrow for his family with the knowledge that he is watching out for them from wherever he is. I know he loved them more than anything. What I don't know is why he had to go.

These things make my heart hurt.

3 comments:

Josh and Kaytee Postma said...

Oh that's truly awful!!! Situations and events like these make you cherish the small things in life that make you happy.

The Whitaker Family said...

I know, Tara. It makes my heart hurt too..... I don't know why. I can't understand it. And then there's Chris's family who lost another son/brother just 7 years ago? Who looses 2 20/30 something children?!?! I'm going to the funeral tomorrow, are you? Just wondering because it would be nice to see you....

The Whitaker Family said...

I did go to the funeral and it was really good. It brought me comfort so I hope it did the same for his family...... His Dad is so strong, its amazing. His youngest brother Seth talked and it was funny and great and broke your heart at the same time. He said that the remaining 3 boys are a bit jealous of Chris and Joe getting to be together... I guess Chris has had 2 open heart surgeries in the last 4 years so its not completely out of the blue. The only good thing about having a 2nd grown child die is that you have the comfort that the two of them are together now... Still breaks my heart... His wife is due with their 3rd daughter in December. He died the day before their 5th anniversary and he was on a business trip when it happened. Another nice thing is that an old ward member/family friend was living in LA and Chris' dad was able to contact him to give Chris a blessing. That brought them a lot of comfort too. 2 minutes after the blessing, Chris died. Chris' wife sang (with 3 friends) at the funeral (WOW!). I guess Joe's wife re-married to someone who has teenage kids. They live in South Ogden so maybe I'll run into her there one day... Anyway, I have the program for the funeral and I'd be happy to send it to you if you want it. Course we're over-due for a get-together, don't you think? What say? Then I could hand-deliver...